As a young girl, I remember the importance of Easter in our life. We were a humble family with one parent working. My father had a blue-collar job, while our mother stayed home. Even with our limited income, I would get a new Easter Sunday dress with lots of ruffles, white patent leather shoes with a matching purse, and a hat or bonnet and white lace gloves to complete the ensemble. I would also get a basket filled with a chocolate bunny and a multitude of various chocolate delights. I would eat myself nauseous. I would do this twice a year. The other holiday of indulgent chocolate abuse being Christmas, both celebrating Jesus.
I love Jesus. Jesus was born knowing his role and purpose. I love that he would hang out with societies outcast. I will admit I don’t understand God. I don’t understand how or why innocent children suffer and die. I believe that God is all powerful and can do anything…I just don’t understand why he doesn’t do his magic now at this moment. When Jesus lived on Earth, He also questioned God but kept serving anyway. I love God anyway. I am hopeful that when I die everything will make perfect sense. I have let go of trying to make sense of the pain and unfairness of life. Such a large spectrum separates rich from poor, healthy from dying. It’s out of my control. I believe we all have a role and purpose no matter where we begin.
What is in my control is choosing to follow the example of tolerance that Jesus taught. I don’t lecture others with views different from mine. My heart aches seeing the religious wars that cause pain and suffering of innocent children. Mothers suffer unbearablely witnessing their children’s pain. What have we become if we begin ignoring the pain of others?
My aspiration, my desire, my hope, is to serve God by serving others. I pray that being open about my struggles might help others that are struggling to keep breathing and trying. We can also feel encouraged in knowing we are not alone as we lift each other up, especially during our times of pain and suffering.
May you never lose hope and may you find peace wherever you go.
Jackie
